Sunday, September 25, 2011

Spitesgiving: A Retrospective

I've basically been too afraid of making the Spitesgiving post all month, because I didn't feel up to the challenge!  I'm going to go the photo blitz route, because I think that's the only way I'll ever get over my intimidation of this Major Eating Event in order to actually make the post.  

There was some total bullshit, like a selection of mixed fruits:

Note the lack of Meat or Cheese
There was supposed to be mango in that fruit salad but we wisely used the mango to make margaritas instead.  Which we then wisely consumed while playing soul calibur.  Ivy FTW!!!!  "Exxxxtend!"

But after the momentary insanity that came from preparing such a minimally healthful dish (pineapple, at least, is like the least healthy possible fruit), we got serious and threw some korean style ribs on my ersatz grill:

I'm too scared of setting my house on fire to use my actual grill
 Bobby Flay claims that this is his recipe, but even the most cursory search on the internets reveals that actually this is a traditional Korean recipe that was probably invented centuries before Bobby Flay was even a twinkle in his mother's eye.  So, there's a fun fact for the Bobby Flay haters among my readership.  AS and I carefully selected the actual asian sesame oil instead of the proudly labeled "ASIAN FOODS" version for the marinade, although CA reminded us that that probably means there is much more Rat, Dog, and Lead (etc) in this marinade than there would have been otherwise.  These ribs really did have an amazing flavor.  They were pretty easy to make, but they do have to marinate for like 3 hours so I don't know if I'll do them again prior to a future Spitesgiving.  We did put away about 6lbs of ribs between the 3 of us over the course of 1.5 days.

We put away the quiche (and tequila, for that matter) much faster:

I don't really remember how the tequila got in this shot... we didn't have any of it with brunch
Ok, there are like 8 eggs in this quiche (not to mention the bacon or two cheeses), and there was only ONE PIECE LEFT after we got up from our epic 4 hours around the brunch table (not an exaggeration).  I'll share with my readership a "secret" that seemed to be of interest to the spitesgiving constituents:  I added about 1 cup of crumbled feta to this quiche, to make it saltier.  Everyone loves a nice, salty quiche, but adding actual salt to the quiche just gives the eggs a funny texture after a certain point.  Adding feta instead makes the egg mixture more creamy, and still ups the salt into instant heart attack levels.  A good trick to have in the quiche making toolbox!

We selected a nice, thick, handmade wheat bread for the French Toast by committee at the Wegman's (note to self for next year, AS doesn't like raisins!)

Can you see the french toast under all the powdered sugar?
 There were only like 2 pieces of french toast left after brunch too!  How did we eat all that?  I think the answer can be found in the photo of me laying sprawled out on the ground in between rounds of brunch (not pictured).  One might believe that I could eat that much, but tiny little CA and AS had to have put away about 3x their body mass right in that one meal!  Kudos!

Here's the full brunch spread.
We did actually eat all the fruit eventually.  I think we ended up blending a lot of it into subsequent margaritas.  
 AS took this fantastic photo of pure, unadulterated BUTTER, and I think it lends a bit of authenticity to the themes of Spitesgiving that I am trying to convey.

For National Security Reasons, I'm not going to share how much butter was consumed during Spitesgiving

**New Header** Spitesgiving Dinner


CA expressed to me prior to Spitesgiving that one Theme she would like to see implemented in the menus was Blue Cheese at Every Meal (there wasn't a picture of the potted stilton from brunch).  Eager to comply, I prepared these blue cheese, bacon, and scallion "puffs."

God, seriously, looking back on this now... how did we EAT all this?
 I think we ate about 25 of these at dinner.  In theory, these should be great, because they are bacon, blue cheese, and scallions.  I think the blue cheese taste kind of got lost in them though, and I'm not sure I'd make them again.  For people that like blue cheese, I don't feel that they were pungent enough, and for people that DON'T like blue cheese, they are probably too gross tasting.  Maybe I could try them again with like a cheddar or something.  That might be worth a shot, as they are pretty easy to make and would probably go over well at events where lots of alcohol is being consumed.

The main event was osso bucco:

Yeah, I braised the shit out of that veal
I had made this exact preparation of osso bucco before, but because of how long it took to prepare all the other dishes, it ended up braising much longer this time around.  I think there was nearly universal agreement that this was right up there on the Most Tender Meat I've Ever Eaten list for all parties present.

We were fortunate to be able to sop up the osso bucco gravy with biscuits at all, but the experience went into fantasyland because we were able to do so with starfleet shaped biscuits.  

Eat long, and prosper
 Thanks AS for this spectacular, nerd and eating themed Spitesgiving Craft!  Especially since CA and I both didn't make our crafts.  Oops.

We rounded out the epic with an 8 layer celebration cake:

When there are 8 layers of cake, there are 9 layers of frosting
I had challenged myself to make double digit layers prior to the weekend, but I foolishly forgot to buy parchment paper (I KNEW we would forget something at the grocery store, even though we took an extremely efficient team approach to the shopping), so I didn't want to risk layers any thinner than this.  Honestly, I'm surprised that I was able to get layers even this thin out of my pans WITHOUT the parchment paper.  I give all the credit for the exceptional nature of the final product here to my stand mixer.  It created a batter that was of a texture that I had never known was possible before, despite my years of consuming butter and sugar.  The egg white mixture was a lacy froth, the egg yolk mixture was like spackle.  It was truly amazing.  Even though I keep a regularly updated list of my best cakes:


  • 26th birthday red velvet
  • Chocolate Amaretto
  • Alton Brown's Tres Leches
This one clearly was, by miles and miles, the best baked good I've ever made (see, all credit to stand mixer).  I will definitely make it again, but only when I have 3 hours (and parchment paper).  I'll make it up to double digit layers someday, just see if I don't!

6 comments:

fen said...

Oh man, I still have dreams about that cake.

I think puffs turned out pretty good, even if they didn't look particularly pretty. If I ever get a deep fryer, I think it would be a great recipe to actually fry the puffs (and maybe even put it in a standard frying batter, or just alone). Next Spitesgiving can be at my place; I will buy a portable deep fryer.

laz said...

I will buy a portable deep fryer

<3 <3 <3

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